Head bunnies

It seriously... it happened again. My printer is cursed. The week I have to print out this fat lab report it decides to run out of toner. Beautiful. Brilliant. Wonderful. Okay, I'm done complaining. It's actually not that big of a deal, I just feel bad printing things from work.

I think I'm having a midlife crisis. I Google searched the symptoms and it seems pretty in line with what I've been feeling for the past year or so. I don't know, I just think that when you're younger the only thing you think about is the future: for the future, for your future, because of the future and so you do X,Y, and Z. It's kind of this unspoken template that we're supposed to follow. It's dumb. The people that don't follow the template are the only ones really living--the ones that are satisfied with the direction in which their lives are headed. At least, a higher percentage of them should be. The rest of us are all cookie cutter cookies blindly following the expectations thrust upon us by societal/familial pressures so closely that we're deceived into thinking that they're our own desires. Our lives are so busy that we're always running at some sort of threshold maximum. We don't stop. The thing is, when you finally do stop to breathe a little you realize so many things that you've never thought about before and you start to question the things that you've never dared to question.

The only reason why I'm thankful for this whole mess is because of the perspective it's given me though I feel as if I've aged 30 years. I was just on the phone with my aunt and she said, "You know, you've always been a little adult... you should have seen the way you spoke to people when you were 1 years old it was ridiculous." I knew I was right. I am 67 years old this year. There's some Benjamin Button action going on right here except I started old and I'm only getting older... that actually doesn't even make sense. I should probably eat something.