Unlucky charms

As of late, life has been a bunch of failures. Some of them were my fault and some of them were consequences of my bad luck. The other day I kept misplacing my wallet everywhere and my roommate had to go back and forth with me to retrieve it. This would have been acceptable if it only happened once; however, it happened three times.

The bad luck continued when I went to 76 to get gas. I stopped at the first gas pump and thought, "why is there a cup where the fuel pump should be, dang it now I have to take it out." I looked up from the cup and there was a sign that said out of order. Go figure. Why else would there be a random cup. I got back into my car and moved forward to the next gas pump. I got out and I realized that it was only meant for people that intended to pay with cash. Oh well, I guess third time is the charm right? I got back into my car and headed to a new gas pump. I got out of my car and looked at the little note on the side of the screen. "Keypad is broken, please pay at the window." Now this was getting a bit ridiculous. I moved forward to the gas pump in front of me and it worked. Only someone like me would be unlucky enough to hit all four of the gas pumps that didn't work. By the way, those were the only four that weren't working, every other one was fine.

Also, I was called back to my doctor's office four times because the nurse kept forgetting to tell me to do things. The first time was for a shot, the second time was for paperwork, and so on.

Then the most disgusting thing on Earth happened today. One of my roommates has a cat in the house and as you all know, I hate cats more than I hate Apple, Prius, and Crocs. Well the cat decided to wonder around and no one could find where it was hidden. I had this sickly fear that it was in my room. I checked, but it wasn't there. Then we looked around in my bathroom, under their beds-- it was nowhere to be found. Then my roommate walked into my room and opened the closet all the way. Low and behold, the nasty old cat had hid its nasty old self in my closet. What a wonderful surprise-- not.

Well I guess I should be used to this seeing as how my life is pretty much the series of unfortunate events. I'm pretty sure when I popped out of my mum's stomach she said something like, "Aw damn, I didn't think my baby would be this hideous." And here I am, too poor for Botox and not qualified for lyposuction.

My roommate's shampoo bottle fell on my foot three times. I'm not sure if it's because I'm unlucky or if it's because I'm too stupid to move the shampoo bottle on the ground. Probably a combination of both.

I got a parking ticket today. They said they couldn't see my permit; yet, it was right there hanging on the rear-view mirror. There goes 40 dollars.

My eyebrows are naturally very hairy...

fly like a G6 & jump <3