Famish

Do you know that when someone loves you it's consistent and not intermittent? It's not only limited to when it's convenient for them. They think about you all the time and they wonder if you're living well and if you're happy.

Have you ever loved anyone?
Has anyone ever loved you?
(don't include family, that's cheating)

Fake

Petco lady: "Wow... this is some good stuff you have here"
Me: "Haha, only the best right?"
Petco lady: "What is your baby's name?"
Me: "Soybean!"
Petco lady: "That's cute! Very original! I've been the dog trainer here for 20 years and I've had enough of Suzie and Max. There was a dog that came in a while ago named No Name..."

She then went on to tell me her life story and I stood there nodding and smiling for 20 minutes while holding a bunch of canned food. Bone to pick--haha get it? I hate it when people call their dogs their babies and they fawn over them and brag about them to everyone that will listen. I also hate it when people do this with their children. It's one thing to be proud of them, but it's another when it's all you talk about. It's annoying. This is the main reason why there are crazy cat/dog ladies. Not all cat/dog owners are like this, but because there are so many of these types of people out there, this becomes the norm and the notion gains notoriety.

So... I did it. I bought it. I had a moment of temporary insanity. I'll post pictures when it comes. My credit card company called me five minutes afterwards because they suspected fraudulent behavior. The fact that I just purchased my tickets for December probably doesn't help my situation.

Posted by my friend. Well said.

First

There's a first time for everything...

Public transportation! Rode the Bart for the first time. 

Drank such a large quantity of wine for the first time. 

Tried Ethiopian food for the first time!

These pictures are not chronologically accurate and they describe the happenings of my life over various days, but I'm too lazy to elaborate, so you're either going to have to talk to me in real life or you're going to have to assume I've been partying--which isn't too far from the truth, but you have to realize that my "partying" is ten degrees lower than how normal people party because I'm like a grandma... doing Sudoku verges on being a party. Anyway, I'm finally back! It was incredibly exhausting, but super fun. :) I didn't think I would admit this, but I'm glad I moved. I think that city was very unhealthy for me; the people, the dramatic events, just... everything. I must have gotten used to suffering because while here I often find myself thinking, "Oh wow! I'm not miserable?" and finding it rather odd. 

Frenzy

HAHA! I like this! It would make using public restrooms more enjoyable.

Fermentation

I really liked the rain today. It was refreshing. Good day. Socializing with old ladies is one of my joys in life. Also, this morning... shooting people is the best. Definitely. 

I'm actually happier without you. I didn't think I would be, but I feel like I can breathe again. I'm suffering less. I wonder if you've realized that I don't intend to ever talk to you again. It's not that I hate you because I don't, but I think this is the right thing to do... for me. I always thought about you before I thought about myself, but you never really cared. I finally stopped crying.

Festivities

If you rely on other people to do things for you nothing will get done; however, it's impossible to do everything yourself because that's not how the world works. Paradox. So what happens if nothing is getting done, but you can't do anything about it? Spam the person you need and cry by yourself in a dark corner when they ignore all of your messages.

There was a dead mosquito under this moon cake. Happy 추석 and 中秋節 everyone. -_-

Fiction

Pretty wise quote from a friend of mine. Turns out Facebook isn't only good for being creepy after all.

"There's a point in life when you get tired of chasing everyone and trying to fix everything, but it's not giving up, it's realizing that you don't need certain people in your life. Fair weather friends only want to come around when they need your sun to shine on their dark and gloomy days."

It's easy to like someone when they're happy and cheerful, but it's difficult to like someone when they're not in the best mood. If you have a friend that has been there for you when you were feeling the worst, you know they're someone worth keeping around, but at the same time if they're at their worst and you abandon them it means you're a pile of sh&t. There are apparently many piles of sh&t in the world.

Forgotten

I agree. Thank you, I really needed this. :)

I do all of this (except sleep), so why do I find that I'm not that happy overall? I feel happy every day though... (at least for the past three days) maybe this article only applies to temporary happiness.

Flan

I was so happy yesterday. I've seriously been having so much fun recently. Not to mention, I finally got this...

Yes! Blue Bottle. So delicious. :)

And... Some cafe music anyone? :) :) 

I'm in such a good mood. :) This is such a dramatic contrast to what I was feeling on Friday. I'm going to blame Friday the 13th and being in that crappy city for my unhappiness. I'm never going back again. That's probably a lie because stuff always happens, but if I ever have to go back again I will be incredibly unhappy. Ever since coming back I feel very... loved. Not sure if that makes sense. In that crappy city I was always working or prompting for words of affirmation or trying to find people that do and it turns out that they don't or are very crappy at expressing it, but here no one needs to tell me because I can feel it. It's effortless, natural, and genuine. I like that.

Friends?

Every time I drive on the freeway and I go down a hill the car in front of me brakes, so I have to brake. I hate it. The funny thing is yesterday I realized that I always think the same thing--"What a waste of inertia"--and then I laugh at myself because I'm such a nerd.

When I woke up I really didn't want to drive that far, but of course I did. I had to get my hard-earned, blood and sweat, slave-labored money somehow right? I was in a really crappy mood for several reasons. Also, why is it that when I get emails I nearly get a heart attack, but when I don't get any emails I can't breathe? It's bad either way. Anyway, I arrived at the toll booth and was irritated because I didn't have any cash on me, so I had to scramble to find five dollars worth of quarters. When I finally looked up at the toll collector, this suave-looking, mid-thirties, Italian guy with his hair slicked back was smiling at me. He said, in a sexy Italian accent, "You are very beautiful, you know? So beautiful. The most beautiful woman I have seen today." And for a few seconds I smiled and laughed embarrassing-ly. That was really sweet. It was exactly what I needed at the time. I debated driving in circles and paying more toll as a confidence booster. Then of course suspicious Joanna took over and I started wondering if everyone before me had been an old lady.

In all of the years that I've been on this planet I have never been called a horrible person and I have never believed that I was one, but today someone made me feel like I was. It's not a good feeling. I don't understand how horrible people can live with themselves. I couldn't even eat today until after my magical unicorn made me feel better

Thanks for always thinking I'm the best even when I feel like I'm the worst. This is so bad... I really can't live without you anymore. I hope I never have to.

每次從讀像又被兇殺一次
但我心早就被你壓碎了.

Frail

This has to end. I'm seriously... I need to stop tormenting myself. I don't know what I see in you when you only make me sad.

脆弱. 回憶.

你真的... 曾經有讓我很高興過.

謝謝你給我的那幾個月,

我會珍惜那時候.

我不找你了.

沉靜. 

再見.

Fight

I really want to like you--to the point where I force myself to make up excuses for you, but it's tiring. I can't trust you because it hurts, but that doesn't mean that I don't want to. My stomach is hurting again. My stomach always hurts if I think about unpleasant things. You know what else is unpleasant? The truth about why we're all unhappy. This is pretty much what I've been saying. Everyone expects us to be amazing and have our lives together all the time, but that's not reality because that's not how it works. It's okay to not have everything figured out. There's nothing wrong with going with the flow as long as it propels you forward.

Silly article. I gave up on people way before I read this for several other reasons, but this merely exemplifies the stupidity of the general public.

Does anyone see that this is what is wrong with our generation? That's usually me. I have an iPhone, but I flip it over and ignore it if I'm out with people because it's rude and disrespectful. If someone is willing to give you their time, which is the most precious thing in the world, then please have the courtesy to at least have a real conversation with them. Angry birds can wait.

Fecundity

Okay, these are hilarious except for the second one because I think she was unconscious. I need to get back into prank-ing people. I think it made my life (and everyone else's) more exciting.

Finally a female drummer. Good song.

New obsession. Actually the whole album is good. This is the second time I like every single song in an album. The only other time I've said that was about Depapepe, but they're purely acoustic, so I don't know if that's valid.

Fraud

Very good article. Perspective and truth. People do tend to chase the emotions they feel while dating and define that as love, but it isn't. "No, love isn't an emotion or even a noun. It's a verb. Better defined as giving. As putting someone else's needs above your own." Why? Because people, in general, are selfish and this is difficult to do.

See? I Told you I would post good English music if I found it. Go figure Jason Mraz would be in it.

Flake

I hate it when people use nuts as a filler because they think that it'll make things taste better (dirty minds--get out of here). When I was younger I would always pick out the nuts from chocolate, etc. and I would get yelled at, "You're throwing away $2!" It just doesn't taste very good...

It had to be done. Smooth as sandpaper.

I'm completely miserable and going insane. It's incredibly dangerous when I feel this way because I start making large purchases. I've transgressed from wanting to buy a $6000 guitar to wanting to buy a car. Good grief. I don't know why I keep worrying about other people when I should probably be worrying about myself. This defies all logic as defined by Charles Darwin.

Fastidious

It's back to this unhealthy cycle. Every time I receive an email I feel like I'm going to get a heart attack, so to spare myself from misery I'm going to choose not to check it anymore. The only things keeping me sane are Running Man and the ability to stalk my $6000 guitar.

You're mean. You make me feel like a weed. I have this unhealthy tendency of liking people that don't seem to like me. I wonder if I like working harder to convince people to like me... What a masochist. The problem here is that even if I do convince them to like me I'm going to stop liking them because they're never as great as I think that they are. I just don't understand why everything is so one sided all the time. I'm sick of initiating things and constantly worrying about people. Honestly, every interaction that I have just makes me realize how lucky I am to have found the right people at the right time and how rare it is to have people in my life that genuinely care about my existence. My friends are more like an extended family.

Feign

It's difficult to find people that think about you all the time (in a non-creepy way) because everyone is so self-obsessed. If you happen to find someone like that in your life you should cherish them forever. 

Sorry, I'm at it again. If I ever find a good English song I'll post it, I swear.

French toast

I'm sick of always apologizing to you for things that I shouldn't have to apologize for. I never make you apologize, I cry by myself and forgive you instead. This is so dumb.

This is the only thing that has made me smile today.